2/22/2007

Crazy Ass Britney Spears Leaves Rehab.
Again.

Holy fuck, do these places have revolving doors? Can someone not shoot a tranquilizer dart into this bitch's neck and tie her down for a day? I'll be damned if Britney isn't turning out to be the maddest hatter at the ball!

When the hell did Britney Spears morph into Courtney Love?

God, it makes me long for the simpler times...back when Britney was trying to convince us all that she was a virgin.

I mean, seriously, somebody call Donatella! Because what really matters here is that she may not be able to dry a bitch out, but she can at least get the dirty street whores of Hollywood to keep their panties on in public.

And anyone who saw those shots of Britney's va-jay-jay knows that she needs to keep that shit under wraps.

So, please, Donatella....hear my plea. Pull out your crazy ass magic wand and work one of your drag queen miracles. Hose a bitch off, smear some product across her face, shoot some ass fat into her lips, and finish her off in some spandex and sparkles.

Because king of all trailer trash K-Fed is actually scheduled for an emergency court hearing today to take the bebe's into his crack-smoking custody. Unlike Courtney, I don't think Brit's got a nanny to play mommy for a few years.

Just in case you've forgotten, dear Donatella, that sperm donor already has a couple of pieces of vagina fruit that he seems to have misplaced.

Yes, folks, it's come to this. Perhaps if public outcry is great enough, we can get Miss D to rise to the occasion and turn another dirty white trash skank into something that will maintain respectability for a couple of years, then kindly fade off the radar.

And really, isn't that what we all want?

1 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't celebrity rehab centers hold much credibility, but rather are there more for appearance, more than anything. It's going to take more than rehab to turn Britney's life around.