Suze Orman Shows Her Ass

Ironically, Suze Orman was recently criticized for her investment advice on MSN Money Central for being “out of touch.” After tonight’s disgustingly content-free interview between Suze Orman and Casey Serin, I’ll second that motion.

Tonight, Suze Orman interviewed renowned mortgage fraudster Casey Serin on CNBC’s “The Suze Orman Show.” While Casey Serin’s critics had hoped that Suze Orman would tear into Casey like a wolverine on crack, Suze Orman proved that she’s all talk.

While I’ve never had any strong feelings one way or the other regarding Suze Orman, what I heard tonight proves that she has joined the ranks of Robert Kiyosaki and others who care more about profile than content.

With that, we’re going to have to downgrade Suze Orman’s professional reputation from “financial expert” to “financial guru.” (For the record, “expert” = self-explanatory; “guru” = an under-informed person who tells others what to do.)

From here, I can only assume that CNBC is changing the name of “The Suze Orman Show” to “Suze Orman Gives Financial Advice to Admitted Multi-State Felons.” Maybe when Casey and Galina Serin finally go to trial, Suze Orman can testify as an “expert” witness.

Tonight, Suze Orman threw a bunch of meatball pitches over the plate at Casey Serin, continually referring to him as “boyfriend” and using a tone that somehow implied her viewing audience was, collectively, a very naughty child.

Note to Suze Orman: Research your guests before you invite them to your show. Because by trying to earnestly parrot advice that Casey Serin’s readers have been giving him for about eight months now, you just sound like a jackass.

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t entirely blame Suze Orman. But tonight’s interview with Casey Serin shows that the staff of “The Suze Orman Show” is lazy as hell.

Because if any of The Suze Orman Show’s staffers had logged a dozen hours on Casey Serin’s website, Suze Orman herself wouldn’t have sounded like such a rube tonight. A recent post by Mr. Bubbles over at ExUrbanNation best describes what Suze Orman should have known before interviewing Casey Serin:

Look at the facts:

1. CS bought 8 properties in a short period of time
on purpose so the banks, credit agencies, and all others involved would not be
aware of his actions.

2. CS bought 8 properties via fraudulently lying
on his applications about income, employment, and owner occupancy.

3.
Casey illegaly wrapped one of the houses without disclosing it the the lender.

4. Casey and Galina ran up over $175,000 in unsecured debt, knowing they
had no ability to pay, in order to sustain their lifestyle and further their
illegal real estate activity.

5. Casey and Galina opened up two DBA real
estate companies, never registering them with the state or incorporatin them.
Casey advertised these companies as real estate investment companies over the
internet and via the USPS. ( remember the 24% return letter, Able Buyer, iam
buying apartments)

6. Casey attempted ( perhaps succeeded) in acquiring
a shell company to fraudulently transfer his personal debt into and to obtain by
fraud credit from lenders.

7. Casey, while protesting to be insolvent,
spent some $30,000 on real estate seminars.

8. Casey while claiming to
be insolvent, has earned unreported income.

9. Casey has continued to
borrow money, knowing he has no intention or ability to repay the debt.

10. Casey and Galina spent over $375,000 ( from cash back at closings
and credit cards)over the course of 2006 and he cannot account for the spending.

Sorry if I missed some of the things, but this is from memory. My point
is that he and Galina knew exactly what they were doing. The plan was to keep
doing the illegal cash back at closings, flip the houses, lather,rinse, repeat.

But it went bad, so Casey being the life long conman, moved on to other
scams. The 24% return letter. Able Buyer. Buying apartments. The phony
corporation. Adsense. Duane. Nigel. Then some more illegal cash back in Utah.

He won't change until he's caught, prosecuted, and in prison. None of
his or Galina's actions were without intent. Each one was to defraud. His made
up persona on IAFF is to cover his tracks. Look at the earth blog and you read a
much different Casey.

I have seen in court many, many criminals. None of
them are guilty. All of them proclaim their innocence. Forget about what Casey
says and focus and what he did.

Actions speak louder than words.

I agree Casey may not be public enemy #1 on the FBI list, but his high
profile and outright disdain for the law is making him come under some intense
scrutiny.

Frankly, I would expect a lot more from a woman who was launched into the public spotlight by Oprah Winfrey. Come on, Suze Orman, did you not learn anything from Oprah about how to vet your guests?

So what should Suze Orman have asked Casey Serin while she had him under the glare of the television cameras? Here are some suggestions:

Suze Orman: So, Casey Serin, exactly how much money were you claiming to make while you were unemployed and lying on your loan applications?

Suze Orman: How are you and your wife Galina Serin six-figures in credit card debt after all of the sweet cash back at closing that you “earned” (sneers).

Suze Orman: Well, Casey Serin, since the topic of honor has come up, why have you not turned yourself in to the FBI office in Sacramento?

Suze Orman: You have mentioned bankruptcy several times on your website. Are you not aware that bankruptcy is a second chance for honest borrowers, not a way for admitted felons to escape both justice and repayment?

Suze Orman: While your wife Galina Serin was doing the books for your shell corporations and family finances, was she not concerned about the obvious fraud and illegal activities?

Poster Jean Val Jean at ExUrbanNation has kindly posted an audio file of Suze Orman’s interview with Casey Serin.

Click here to contact Suze Orman.

Defining "Intent"

In multiple (possibly hundreds) of instances, Casey Serin has told the world a novel's worth of fiction about his intentions: He never intended to commit mortgage fraud; he never intended to force his banks into repossession; he intended to repay "every dirty penny" of the borrowed monies.

I've thought all along that this was a load of hooey, and Casey Serin's latest, repeated comments about exploring bankruptcy protection (ha!) prove that his actual intent is to get away as unscathed as possible from the financial trainwreck that he and his wife Galina Serin created.

I don't know how I missed this article, but 'lawnmower man' over at ExUrbanNation deserves major credit for bringing it to the forum's attention.

In January of this year, C. Robert Simpson wrote a fantastic article called "Truth or Consequence" in the Scotsman Guide. It is an incredibly insightful piece on mortgage brokers' role in the subprime lending meltdown, and I found myself nearly breaking my neck by nodding so vigorously in agreement.

I have been arguing with friends and family members for several months now that mortgage brokers should be held accountable (with buyers, of course) for non-performing, no-documentation subprime loans. The reason is that they are charged with vetting a potential borrower on behalf of the financial institution.

The bank trusts that when mortgage brokers approve a borrower as a good risk that he or she actually is. Did any of these greedy bastards ever think about why subprimes often paid a heftier commission? Because finding performing borrowers in this category is tough. Any asshole can give a loan to a crackhead, so to speak. Simpson agrees (although in a less profane tone, of course), saying:

Some months ago, I attended a loan-originator luncheon, where a speaker from the
FBI gave a presentation about the latest mortgage frauds and prosecutions. The
agent said that if a stated-income loan shows an income of $10,000 per month and
the borrower's actual income is much less than that -- say, $5,000 per month --
then it is fraud, and the FBI would prosecute it as such.

The loan originators were incredulous. One broker stood up to say, "But lenders created stated loans so we could state whatever income would get the borrowers the
loan."

If I read his facial expression correctly, the FBI agent couldn't believe what he had just heard. There ensued a lively give-and-take between the agent and the loan originators regarding the intent of stated loans.

Simpson included Casey Serin in his article, and there is a very telling bit in it that should keep Casey and Galina Serin up at night with cold sweats of fear. Because it's such a huge fucking smoking gun that you can almost hear the prison doors clang as you read the article.

Of Casey and Galina Serin's eight properties, Simpson states:

On six of the properties, he received cash back at closing. The largest check he
received was for $50,000. The cash was paid to a bogus company,
controlled by a third party. It was then funneled back to Serin. In all other escrows, cash was paid to the seller, then back to Serin after closing.

Wh..wha...WHATTHEFUCK?!?! This certainly clarifies the "INTENT" question. Holy shit, we've got shell corporations, an undisclosed third party....Look here, little Casey Serin--this goes way beyond "I didn't know it was wrong," which is something you've always claimed.

This demonstrates some serious intent to defraud. And since there are already hundreds of thousands of people in America who are calling for Casey Serin's head, there's just no way that the proper authorities can (or should) overlook his theiving ass. Same goes for his wife Galina Serin.

If you have joined the ranks of the people who are fed up with Casey Serin and Galina Serin still being allowed to walk the streets as free people, feel free to contact the following folks to express your displeasure.

You can report mortage fraud via the following:

FANNIE MAE
1-800-732-6643
mortgagefraud_tips@fanniemae.com

FBI
FBI Online Tip Form
Sacramento Field Office (916) 481-9110

SACRAMENTO COUNTY DISTRICT ATTORNEY
Real Estate Fraud Unit (916) 874-9045
Special Investigations Division (916) 874-5897

Whatever Happened to Frugality?

My family traveled extensively throughout my childhood. But my parents always placed a premium on spending time with their parents. Because of this, we lived in close proximity to one set of grandparents, and spent at least two months each year with the other set.

One grandfather, particularly, was incredibly frugal. When he retired, he took over the household management for my grandmother, under the guise of giving her her own retirement. But really, it was because he wanted to shave as much money as possible from the family budget.

To this end, he had a circuit of three grocery stores. One for the staples, one for the perishables, one strictly for milk. The family joked about his 'milk store', incredulous that he would take the extra time to pick up milk from a third store.

His explanation made perfect sense. It was directly on the path home from his second store, and stopping there for milk saved him a quarter per gallon. He could rattle off the savings in a heartbeat..."Fifty cents a week, two dollars a month, twenty-four dollars a YEAR!" he would finish off in visible glee.

When he purchased the Sunday paper from the vendor outside of our church, he liked to point out that the paper was paying him. After he finished clipping coupons and doling them out on double- or triple-coupon days, this was in fact true.

While my Baby Boomer parents and their siblings mocked my grandfather's grip on his money, I think they overlooked his earliest financial impressions. They had never wanted for a thing, and this sense of being 'well-off' led them to pay a premium for shortcuts. It didn't ever really click with them that my grandfather had lived through the Depression...an event that he would carry with him for the rest of his life.

Similarly, spending so much time with him as a child made its own impact on me. My grandfather liked to bastardize various sayings and cliches, making them his own. The one I remember most clearly was truly his own economic compass. He would look at me and say, "A penny saved is BETTER than a penny earned, because you don't have to pay taxes on that one!"

I'm indescribably grateful for the example that he set. When I learned that I would be responsible for paying for my college education, his lessons became that much more important. By working two full-time jobs and living on the cheap, I was able to pay for my private university. The discomfort of the situation catalyzed me to graduate as quickly as possible, and finished a dual-degree in three years.

I'm not sure when it started, but I myself have three grocery stores. I switch back and forth between two stores for the staples, depending on what's on sale during any given week. I round this out with a trip to Trader Joe's for the 'gourmet' items and wine.

I get a strange thrill out of compiling a crazily cheap meal. It's the same feeling of accomplishment that I have after completing a project or a fruitful day of work. I have been known to call friends and rattle off the contents of a dinner plate, complete with a cost breakdown.

This past week, for example, presented a fantastic array. Here's a sample of some favorites.

The priciest meal of the week:
scallops, $2.50 on sale
brown rice, $0.18 per portion
fresh asparagus, $0.87 on sale
Total cost: $3.55

Another favorite:
mahi mahi, $2.26 on sale
brown rice, $0.18 per portion
frozen corn, $0.10 per portion
frozen green beans, $0.10 per portion
Total cost: $2.64

Veggie burritos, a quick and easy regular:
whole wheat tortilla, $0.11 per portion
brown rice, $0.18 per portion
black beans, $0.20 per portion
homemade salsa, $0.10 per portion
shredded lettuce, $$0.15 per portion
Total cost: $0.74 !!!!!!!!

If you open my pantry right now, you'll find at least a six month supply of my favorite mineral water. Normally $3 per bottle, I stocked up when it was on sale for $0.99. It won't go bad, and I know it will be consumed at some point. Hopefully the store will run another sale as I start to run low.

The frugality shines through in other elements. I go out of my way to live in places that have a variety of shops and services within walking or biking distance. Not only does this exponentially increase my quality of life by reducing the amount of time spent fighting traffic, but on average, I use less than one tank of gas per month. Most months, actually, it's about a half-tank, but other months are obviously higher.

These small steps in my life make a huge difference. And that's a good thing, because I have expensive hobbies. I love to travel; and I believe that the highest and best use of 'extra' money is spent having a spectacular meal and gorgeous wine with my best friends. Whether this means going out to an incredible restaurant, or inviting people over for a lovingly-prepared dinner party, the cost of these events comprise the majority of my recreation and entertainment budgets. It is the one area where I don't take shortcuts.

Even when I travel, I'm an off-season traveler. This is in large part a survival tactic. I despise crowds. By traveling off-season, I get to enjoy a much more leisurely pace to my days, receive attentive service, am far more likely to be upgraded on my flights/hotels/cars, and spend anywhere from one-half to one-third than if I traveled during peak times.

I know that in our world, there is such an emphasis on various shortcuts to wealth. But I have to tell you, I'd love to see some of those crazy financially-based reality shows (Flipper Nation and the like) replaced with some good common sense application of the FUNDAMENTALS of wealth building.