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"Black Snake Moan"

Is Samuel L. Jackson only going to star in movies with the word "Snake" in them from now on ???

Is it wise to name a movie that has a white girl in panties chained by a black man, "Black Snake Moan" ???

Can Chrstina Ricci's hotness in her white cotton panties carry a move that Roger Ebert compares to the awful Patrick Swayze dud "Road House" ???

Why the fuck is Justin Timberlake acting ???

These are all questions raised by today's release of "Black Snake Moan," or, its street name "Snakes on a Chain."

Early viewer reviews show that people either love or hate this movie, giving it an average C+ range. Critical reviews also fall into the C+ range. An oft-mentioned curiosity is that folks across the board are impressed with the musical selections in the film. So it's got that going for it.

But the C+ response can't be news to producers. It's no surprise that the movie trailer focuses largely on Ricci's panty-clad butt, while she looks wild-eyed and chained. Nor that the movie's publicity poster features the tagline "Everything is Hotter Down South." Wow...there are so many double-entendres going on there that I'd have to actually use exponents to calculate.


That smacks of lowest-common-demonitor advertising to me. And no doubt that millions of people will go see this movie for the Christina in panties element. Unfortunately, the trailer is a sort of false advertising. Viewers use terms like "sweet" and "redemptive" when describing this film, not "sweaty" or "writhing", which I think would make the panty-party more effective.

Early trailers left out any mention of the esteemed thespian Justin Timberlake. I'm sure that was no mistake, either. Who the hell has ever clamored to see Justin Timberlake act?!? I mean, he's definitely got a huge contingent of people hoping to see him do gay porn, but other than that, I see no reason why he should be invited to film something longer than a music video (and even then.....)

A friend remarked that Samuel L. Jackson must be taking roles these days based on their proximity to golf courses. "Give me a rental house on the ninth green" must be written into his contract rider.

I'll admit that I would head off to watch Christina Ricci bounce around in panties for a couple of hours. But it's not that kind of movie, so I'm going to pass. The movie opens today, so it will be interesting to see how its opening weekend plays out.

Have you seen it? What do you think?

70 comments:

NewbietoNYC said...

there are so many double-entendres going on there that I'd have to actually use exponents to calculate.

That was funny. Real funny. I'm going to try and use it in a sentence tomorrow.

Also: Agreed on Black Snake Moan. Who, exactly, is the target audience for this movie? J.C. Chasez and Adam Goldberg?

tannybrown said...

Oh, I'll be going. Black Snake Moan is going to change my life forever.

Aspeth said...

LOL....I just saw these. Wow, let me know how that worked out for you. Casually dropping that in a sentence might be hard.
Tanny, I definitely think that you could achieve some level of zen by going to see Black Snake Moan ing On a Plane. Or maybe it will just provide further Christina Ricci fantasy fodder. Anything's possible.

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